Post Fiesta Update

Wow, so I actually have a surprising amount of updates. Sorry to make this post super long, but here's what has happened since the last post.

1. BG update
2. Friend's wedding
3. Bartender update

Let's start with #1. 

So I thought I already wrote about this, but guess not. I continued to text him through the weekend and finally ended up meeting up with him on Saturday night of Fiesta. At this point I had been drinking ALL day but less at the end so I was more sober than I wanted to be, and unable to get really re-drunk.

I meet up with him at the original bar that we met at on Saturday and he is fairly drunk and being kind of a dick to me. At first I'm kind of annoyed/tired, so when he walks over to his friend to chat, I start talking to the people next to me. Embarrassingly, the girl asks me how I know BG, and I hesitate and say "I know him from this bar actually". Of course she responds awkwardly with "Oh...well he's a good guy". UGH. Then I started talking to one of the guys and BG magically reappears.

I'm chatting with BG about how last time he came over ended awkwardly and he mentions that I pretty much made him leave. Um, not quite, but I agree that it was awkward. Long story short, we leave and go to my house. At which point he tells me I'm in charge (duh).

Post hookup and post all of the me-making-him-leave-convo BS he tells me he has to go because he has a bike race in the morning. I'm like "UMMM I don't think so after all of the crap you gave me". We argue about it for a while, and when I say that he can probably ride his bike after sleeping here, he replies with "YOU DON'T KNOW ME". Then, we hookup again, after which he says "Okay I really have to go".

At this point I'm like okay fine and he's like "Bye babe". HAHA.

I've drunk texted with him briefly since, not to be confused with sexted, which has not happened.

 2. My bridezilla cray friend got married a couple weeks ago in the hottest weather ever (104 on the day of the wedding). It was a 5 day wedding extravaganza ending with the party on a Sunday night. 

The party ends up being pretty fun despite bride bitch's crayness leading up to it. One of my friends went through the guest list with her in advance to identify the 3 single men. Apparently she did a poor job because one of the groomsmen was single as well as one of the bartenders from her now husbands bar - none of these guys were identified during the screening process.

So, another friend points out the bartender, who I soon make fun of and nickname Magic Mike because he looks all dumb and smiley. At some point I change my mind as someone points out that he checked me out - game on.

I decide at one point that I am just going to get really drunk at this wedding because a. it's fun and b. it's been the longest fucking week of my life. My drunk level gets to the point where I do a public dance floor worm, in my bridesmaid dress.

Post-wedding, we all after party at the hotel, at which point I decide, I want to get REALLY HIGH too. We share two joints between 6 or 7 people and voila - I get really high. Partying continues until 4AM when this recently married guy gets drunk and creepy- at which point I say game over. As we're all leaving, Magic Mike notes that he left his alcohol cooler in one of my friends rooms. At which point, another friend suggests he should GET SOMEONE"S NUMBER (I'm like, I'm Handling it, bruh). So I get his number and show him that I added him as Magic Mike, haha.

Everyone goes in their rooms and we wait awkwardly in the hallway until I'm like, "so what do you wanna do?" We make out a bit in the hallway until someone opens the door - then I say that this hallway scene is not gonna work, so we move to the ice machine. Once that option expires via passerbyers, he insists on getting a room.

At this point its like 445AM, so I am kind of resistant to this idea since a room costs like $180. Regardless, we end up in the lobby. Somehow I am shoeless and without any possessions except my phone - classy. The hotel front desk bitch says "You guys are still up?" alluding to the fact that she told us to be quiet hours ago.

The first thing I do when we get to the room is turn the AC to 40 degrees - kind of extreme but it didn't seem to work that well. I remember thinking I had never felt this gross and sticky before.

We start messing around and I ask if he has a condom. He doesn't and says we'll just have to fool around. WHAT?! Who spends nearly $200 on a hotel room without bothering to get a condom. Remember how I said he didn't seem smart before? LOL. So we hook up and it takes FOREVER. I really wanted to sleep at one point but felt kinda bad that he paid for the room.

That's pretty much the end of that story 'til I walk o' shame back to my real room at 9am.

3. Bartender

So I still haven't banged this bartender and I still want to. I'm not sure why it hasn't happened yet, but here's the latest.

My roommate and I decide to get a burger at around 8PM at bartender's workplace. There are no seats, so we sit at the bar and he's working. I guess he was embarrassed from the teeth-removing night because he would not come to talk to us for the first 10 minutes.

Once he gets over that he comes to say hi and and we magically have replacement beers as soon as we finish our first IPAs. He then asks if we're going out and I kind of say yes since I can't say no to him. Soon, the three of us are doing shots and drinking mixed drinks before we head downtown.

Once he gets off we go to this fancy Hollywoodish bar and I am totally under-dressed in shorts and a moneky tee-shirt. Luckily, I am also drunk so I don't care. Once we get there we bypass all of the security because this bartender is the most VIP person my roommate and I have ever met in Santa Barbara.

We get drunker at that bar then leave to go to the bar where I met the BG..haha. At this bar I am pretty rrruuunk and I can't remember exactly what happened. I do know that at one point I was chatting with the bartender I said "Okay, I don't want to be in a bar anymore, where are we going?" BOLD. He responded to this comment with something in his typical range of cray like "I'll fuck the shit out of you, if you want me to"> As we know, I am not good at direct, despite asking for it with my question. I honestly don't remember what I said to that except something about how I was leaving. As I am about to go, he kisses me and I leave with my roommate.

I get bartender's number from roommate and text him something lame like "Why am I going home?"

Since I am really drunk I am failing to notice that my roommate may be even more drunk. We end up falling asleep on the same couch, and I wake up at 6AM with a dead arm. Struggles at work on Friday - I show up at 945AM.

Anyway, I'm pretty sure bartender situation will happen soon enough.

BG Texting

Since I'm cray, I was stalking BG on Twitter and noticed that he was posting pics from SB, meaning he is in town. I've been texting back and forth with him all week, with suggestions of meeting up but it never really happens.

Last night, he did his usual "what's up" 11:45PM text, kind of annoying since I work the next day and don't go to the bars on weeknights usually. I decided to reply "come over," kind of slutty I know, but I don't feel like pretending that I want to be in a bar so I can skip getting ready/walking over/having a drink when it all ends the same.

Here's how the rest of the convo went:

BG: idk I'll see how I feel.You gonna be up for a while

ME: (pissed) Probably not.

BG: I pretty faded. Idk if I could ride that far.

ME: Not enough X in BMX?

BG: Ha  don't ride that one drunk

I'm just gonna pause here to mention that he is CLEARLY not getting my jokes at all. It's like midnight now.

ME: Well how long are you in town this time?

BG: Till next week

ME: Maybe we can try harder to hang out this weekend. Or you can just leave magnums in my room.

Pause again - I don't know why I thought this comment was so funny since I was kinda being dumb that night...but it's always funny until it's not, right?

BG: Haha yea for sure

Still not getting jokes. It's 1AM now.

BG: You didn't want to sleep with me so I had nothing to do with them

The above text is when it was less funny. At this point, I FINALLY realize he is just drunk and not understanding what I'm saying at all.

ME: Haha it was the first time we really hung out. I was just kidding, but it was funny to find those. I do want to hang out before you leave though, so call me tomorrow.

So much for trying to be less awkward. Maybe I'll have an update after this weekend, but not if this kind of BS continues on my end, lol.